How To: Achieve Happiness

10 May

Many friends and family members ask, “how do you stay so positive?” and more often than not, I deliver a genuine smile and say , “It’s easy”.

I’d like to share some advice about this.

Now, we all have a friend or possibly someone you know who is negative. To the point where being in their company means you’re signing up to live 15 episodes of reality television.  He/She’ll turn a good meal into a debate about abortion when we’re all just there to sip a few bubbles and toss the ice rocks in the scotch. He/She’ll degrade our plans for the night, somehow create a joke that’s so negative, the only person not laughing is his target, and OF COURSE, has no real goals or ambitions himself/herself. Now, this is a just an example, but I’m sure you could relate one way or another. Any who, I set myself up to do just the opposite.

I love to involve everyone on my conversation by creating fun topics that everyone can pitch something in on. Perhaps an ex-lover? Gosh, who doesn’t have a “Poor Fellow My Country” novel about it. Being positive is mostly creating and surrounding people around you who want the feeling of being around others who can open up to you like shopping malls on black Friday. Over time, I’ve filtered out the brick munchers and replaced them with a core of people who really blend well together.

But, this isn’t to say you can’t be happy alone either. So, your first step in being happy, is create a system where you will only see those who make you enjoy life AND MAKE SURE with this new group(s) that you will have a very low chance of spotting out those that remind you of a new world war. VERY, very important. If you choose to try and combine or involve these two together, you’ll be better off plumping your ass on the waimangu-geyser and taking a splash.

In my experiences, I’ve found happiness in being in a group and being alone. Although, both very different. If you’re lost, not comfortable in yourself, or anything that makes you not want to involve yourself, I suggest finding yourself alone. You don’t want to show your unfinished product to a group, unless they’re really helping you (not literally) reach your potential. You have to always ask yourself how you can become better. Do you feel like you can be better? Rhetorical. Think about what you can do to become happy. (jeopardy music)

What is… a large, compiled list of SHIT?

Good start, reader!

For example, I wanted to be more comical. So, I watched movies/comedians that I enjoyed and brought a creative way to deliver yourself in conversations. I wanted to be in better shape. I hit the gym consistently for a while, ate better, really wanted to better myself each day. I wanted to play music. I learned to play piano, guitar and play some drums to the point where I enjoyed to do it. I wanted to become charming. So, I watched a lot of Disney movies…. Not exactly, but I always found the right things to say. Find your ideas, and make goals. But, jeeze louise, poppa cheese you hear that everywhere right? Have you ever just picked one or two things and revolved your life to focus and improve on something? If you have, then you wouldn’t roll your eyes as if you listened to your grandfather tell you a story about a bridge.

While you improve alone, don’t neglect anyone who is part of your life. Don’t feel bad for yourself and never return phone calls, texts or however you communicate with people. Take it as you’re adding to your already great profile of attributes. Don’t become big headed, become modest and understanding. Also, don’t tell others you have all these problems and that you’re working on it. You don’t want people to feel bad for you and give you an “awwwwuhhhhh”. Just do it and take compliments on the way with a simple, thank you.

Additionally, in groups of people you see regularly, and I cannot stress this enough, choose your role. You may think it’s just a group a fellas or gals, but you have a role don’t you? Bobby makes a lot of the plans, Charlie is loud and gets everyone laughing, Sandy is sweet and takes care of everyone. Decide your role. If you want to change out of it, it’s because you’re most suited for that and found your trade, rather than thinking you’ll grab more attention or whatever the reason may be.

Things to always keep in mind are your fellow peers. Don’t be a push-over, but also voice your opinion properly, without a tone that similar to those brick munchers you ditched 6 paragraphs ago. If you have something to say about someone, EXPECT that the person will hear it as if you were saying right to their face. SO IMPORTANT. I’ve personally lost a few pals from that. If you have a question, a thought, or simply want to tell me how terrible I am, post below and I’ll be sure to reply.

We all can change.

– Tyler J. Cuda



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